I am still discovering my arrondissement, even if there are about 1000 tourist attractions in this city, my daily activity is to watch/capture the mundane — i love it.
As you might have already figured, it’s not here that you will find some touristic or party pictures. You can head on my flickr account for some eiffel tower shots tho.
As we are on our way to week 6 in Paris, i am still in between stirring moods. One of our cat started to feel sick a week ago, making me feel rather miserable after not sleeping well for the last 7 days, always on the emergency mode to detect anything abnormal from our two sweet little fur balls.
This opened the door wide for a new crisis (!), new events to make me digg deep again in my soul to find out that a part of me still believe that i am not allowed to give myself all that i have, see comfort and abundance in many ways. This part can easily list all the reasons why i should *not* have left, and so, after some days alone in the dark, another part of me woke up, this time to let me hear the opposite: how courageous it was of me to take my dream seriously, sum the energy and believe enough in myself to take what seems for many like a huge risk (of loosing comfort and security) – and not letting anything get in the way. I left, even if dad is sick, even if my back pain issues are still unresolved, even if i (should) could have waited to have more savings so to be safe (like in supa-dupa-ultra safe, as if this could happen!).
So, let’s call these two opposites which give me wonderful headache since a week, the dark and the light parts of myself. The dark side, i could as well call him Dark (as in Dark Vador, but you probably already got this), still keep listing all the reasons why i should not have moved, beside listing all the ways in which i will be punished (see: have my cat being sick must be *because* of the move to Paris a month ago), and i believe this part, until the light (Luke!) can fight back, prove me right and support my decisions. I should be enjoying myself here guys, not having a fight with my own self!
So i must admit that the cold weather (Paris is just too cold, hard to believe that we still heat our flat), the gray and the lack of sleep started to have me believe that i am just unable to find or have any fun in my life, anymore. I even get homesick, deeply, missing all the comfort i have left at home. And i read all these messages from friends, who all envy us — if only they could see how uneasy some days can be! But again, i’ve always been, up until now (and hoping this will change soon), someone for whom the glass is always half empty – so if it is cold and gray, these are enough reasons for me to end up looking for pleasure or anything that could cheer me up.
Beside all this fuzyness, i find great comfort in sitting at my local coffee (Le Naguerre), read new books (Sonya Choquette, Sark and Anais Nin), and taiking pictures on my daily walks. Hopefully, this new week will bring more warmth and laughter in my heart.
I came to the realization that each day, it is up to us to hang onto drama or joy —
it is all up to you and me to choose, if the events are with or against us, if the glass is half empty or half full, everyday.
Also, i think gray days really have this something special.
Pictures in order: Eiffel tower under coming rain menace, Being at home hidding, The sky, when it is blue.
Hope you are having a nice holiday! Now, let me take you for a walk in my hood!
Paris is gray and cold right now, nothing too inviting… Spotting neon advertising is nice for such gray weather. While waiting for the sun, resting at home, taiking walks and eating good food is all i need.
My messy work table. After 3 weeks, i can finally sit and feel in my creative bubble (see all notes when clicking on the picture). Second picture is me back from the market.
There is so much to write, it’s a little overwhelming. Just a few sentences would not do justice to all of what’s happening in one’s mind when moving abroad (and when abroad means Paris). My eyes can talk as well, so for now, just a few clichés should do!
